Putting out fires

All I do is put out fires at work. From minute to minute I am running somewhere. Maybe it is two meetings in one day that I found out about at the last minute. Or, a phone call that has me running out to a campus for a week long unplanned project.

We already have a plan for the whole year and it must be met. I am trying to hire someone and that process is unbelievable. Government processes are laborious and very inefficient.

Today was my last day at work before my week long vacation and the two meetings I mentioned above really cut into what I needed to wrap up. My stress level is off the charts. I get home and a VP sent me an email asking me to re-do a document by tomorrow. I can't even access the damn file to update it. I now have to have my assistant call me tomorrow on our long car ride and tell her what to type for me.

I am a visual person. I need to see what I am writing this is awful. The document is for a Board agenda and its very important. I met my deadline and all was well until this one person looked at it. So, I can't relax now. this is just insane.

I am so overloaded that I thought I saw my exboyfriend one day on the side of the road. I turned and he was gone. My eyes are foggy, my back pain is worse and my face aches...and my body all over.

I am literally breaking down little by little...I can't sleep at night even with my seroquel...i don't want to increase the dose but I might have to.

I want to scream but can't I have no more energy for even that...